I had an epiphany the other day … small boys of today will grow up to be the young men of tomorrow. Before you start wondering why it took me so long to grasp that or even my grasp on life cycles or grasp on reality… remember it was my epiphany so do not question it!
The first thing that brought this on was an innocent, routine trip to the supermarket. I was with my son and after filling our trolley picking items from the 2 main food groups, chocolate and bread, we were ready to pay and leave. Near the till, there was a young man ahead of me with a trolley full of stuff but his jeans were sagging so low he could hardly walk and push his trolley at the same time…something about men not having the multitasking gene I think. Oh, well, that was not the worrying bit, once we got the till, trauma began. You see his jeans were sagging so low such that each time he bent over to pick an item from his trolley, we all were visually assaulted by his inner wear and it was becoming scary by the minute as the said pair of jeans was threatening to fall and again, he was emptying his trolley so he could not multitask and so the option was what ... I grab the jeans for him should the jeans get tired of hanging dangerously? Did I mention that he was as fat as a toothpick and the said jeans would have been baggy on me ... a full figured African woman??
Second incident was when I was having my hair done by the locksmith (it does have a nice ring to it than hair dresser if you have dreadlocks!) and there these young people also doing their hair. I refer to them as young people as am still not sure if they were boys or girls, the way they dress and do their hair, one cannot always tell.
Well, one of them really wanted to cut his /her hair into a Mohawk and they started talking about how their parents could not understand what a Mohawk was. The annoying bit was when one gave insight into the situation. “You are expecting too much from your parents … they are way over 35 years of age and they cannot get fashion!” By the way, I have taken literacy liberty to translate this as these young ones speak in foreign tongues.
What an insult to you who are over 35 years (am still 25 years as you already know!) …we all saw Mr T while growing up and he had a hairstyle ….it did not have a name then and am not sure weird would suffice but there is no difference with the Mohawk … so can they stop bashing us, er sorry, those in their 30s??
So what makes these young ones think they invented fashion? We were fashionable teenagers …we had taste and our parents were not in touch with things. So do they think that those fashionable, hip (does use of this word betray my age?) and funky (again, betrayal by use of time-warped phrases) teenagers grew up and became the fuddy duddy parents of today?
Well, I for one have a son and his jeans will not be sagging in public if I have any say in the matter. In fact, it is very possible that by the time he becomes a teenager, walking naked will be the in thing and his friends will be laughing at him as his mother will still be making him wear clothes.
Call me a teenage-rights-abuser-in-waiting but I foresee that my house will be very unpopular with teenagers and their parents forced to come see what some strange things that will only be found in my house ...belts. Not only will my son be wearing all his clothes in the right order and yes, I determine what is the right order, but they will be staying in place!
Blessings y’all!
