Hhmm, where to start ….I am feeling like I have been unfaithful to my blog for the last 3 months or so especially because during that period of time I have spent lots of time reading other peoples’ blogs. Some of these were blogs that guys who read my blog asked me to check out and I discovered many great blogs. Indeed, some of them were so great that I found myself thinking if these so called readers of my blog were hinting that I needed to pull up my socks!
Truth is for a while there I was sure my blogging days were over. I kind hoped I would get a good excuse to completely convince me to shut down my blog! I had blogged for over a year and I believed that it was time to move on. I honestly believed my blogging days were gone until last December when I had gone for function somewhere and I was the MC for the day. At the end of the function, as usual I stopped to sign some autographs and as my security team fought of the frenzied fans, a certain young man threw himself in front of my car and said if I was not going to leave my husband for him, there was no point of being alive.
Ok, so I may have stretched the truth a bit… but hey, I need to make sure you are still with me!!
But seriously, I was emceeing the function and after it ended this young man (true story!) asked me if I was really the Mueni of the musings blog. You see, when the host was giving the vote of thanks she happened to mention that how we met online. I was shocked because I never really thought that I had male readers in that age group and so I mumbled yes. Maybe he was from the blog police and was here to arrest me …anything I said could be used against me in a blog of law. Or maybe he would just pinch my nose.
As we began to chat, he told me that he was a poet and had a whole collection of poems. He said I inspired him. Then he asked me how come I have not posted any new blogs in a while. Honestly, I fumbled for an answer and he said something that I will not forget in a long time. He said he read my blog because I kept it real and it had “soul”.
Being the slow gal I can be at times I was not sure if he meant it had “sole” and therefore I should leave the blogosphere …. you know how these young people talk in parables. Well, only after I got home did I realize he had paid me a compliment!
Well, he also said he will bug me till I go back to blogging or at least unfriend him on facebook. I thought it was an empty threat.
I was sooo wrong! Every so often he would send me a message of facebook and ask me about my blog. He told me he was convinced my blogging days were not over. I began a barrage of excuses why I was not up to the challenge of keeping the blog going. At one point I told him the truth, er, the half truth. That I was working on a new project and I really did not think I had enough time to do that and to blog regularly. He argued that he believed I could do both, women were great at multitasking! I told him he could not understand why I cannot do that. Today, I am grateful you did not listen to me Mark!
You see, am on a nine month project that has kept me pretty busy worshipping the porcelain goddess for the last 12 weeks. Get that look off your face, I have not found a new religion, I have just been sick, morning sickness … all day long! For those whose train of thought is still at the boarding station … I am pregnant!!
There have been days when I have been so sick and wondered if and not when the nine months will end but at the end of week 12 things changed and now I am much better. Soon I will be unable to see my toes but I am fine … I will still be able to feel the toes anyway …I-cannot-see-the-air-yet-I-know-it-exists- coz-I-breathe-it-kind-of-thinking :-.
Being expectant has been a reminder of how with God preparation is necessary for potential to be fully realized. Yes, the nine months can be excruciating but they are necessary. If I tried to have this baby at week 4, we would not be talking of a baby. The nine months are necessary for the development of the baby’s entire genetic code – gender, hair color, eye color, height and even personality. How it all fits into my belly I will never understand but it is all part of the miracle of life.
Believing that I will make it through this season is essential. I need to believe that at the end of it all, I shall hold a healthy baby in my arms and when I envision that glorious moment, my current discomfort and the expected short, painless and did I say very short, labor then becomes something I can look forward to because I know how I want this journey to end.
It is the same with whatever dreams you have.
If you allow the obstacles, challenges and inconveniences to overwhelm
you, you will lose hope and the dream will be prematurely terminated. It will become a dream aborted. A destruction of potential before it has a chance to be realized.
Abortion is a tragedy that denies the future the value contained within that life. The value contained within that dream you are carrying.
Sometimes birthing a dream may seem like a long or even a wrong road due to the challenges but I can assure you that God is not caught off guard. He knew that your dream will be threatened all along. He equips you to make it through the storms and sustains you in the midst of the storms. He is right there, spurring you on to be all He says we can be.
I do not know what your dream for 2012 is, maybe it is to start a business but your proposal has been turned down several times, to pursue a course and yet you do not have the fees, to be a singer and another door has been shut on your face again. Someone says you are not good enough, talented enough, educated enough or that simply you are not worthy to want more than you already have. They may have made you feel insignificant and small by rejecting you or your idea.
You must choose to overcome these potential destroyers or they will take you away from your destiny and thwart your future.
Do not let fear, past experiences, current circumstances, disappointments, rejection, criticism, hurt, insecurities, offenses, unforgiveness or ignorance cause you to give up and abort your dreams.
Protect the dream you are carrying!
Happy and blessed 2012 you’ll!
